Photo: Gina DiVincenzo and dad
This article was the result of an interview I did with parenting blogger, Maria Adcock. It highlights my life experiences and what guided me to this profession.
Reprinted with permission from Bicultural Mama, originally published July 8, 2019 by Maria Adcock.
Advice for Third Culture Kids from a Former One
If you grew up in different countries, you may have been known as "the kid who moved around a lot." But there's actually a term for this. "Third Culture Kids" is the phrase coined to describe children who grew up in cultures other than the ones their parents grew up in.
Gina DiVincenzo, a social worker, wife, and mother, grew up as a third culture kid. She was born in Milan, Italy, to American parents. Her father's job in international business and consulting required him to make many moves globally. Throughout her childhood, Gina lived in Italy, Canada, Indonesia, Puerto Rico, and Singapore. She attended college and graduate school in New York where she currently resides.
What did you enjoy about being a Third Culture Kid?
"It was exciting! There was always a new place and a new adventure. I'm a friendly person so I loved meeting new people and experiencing new cultures. We traveled the world as a family."
What were some challenges?
"One of the hardest parts was when I was really happy in one place and then had to move. It was always difficult to say goodbye to the friends I made."
"Regarding stability, it was sometimes hard. I felt like I had no real roots and no connection to my extended family because we always moved. Emotionally, this was difficult."
What are some important things you learned?
"I learned to open my mind to differences — different cultures, different governments — and became aware of how others lived outside of America. I gained awareness of global citizenship and interconnectedness. We're all human with similar needs, aspirations, joys, and sadness."
Do you have any regrets?
"I have zero regrets. I would have liked to have had someone to talk to, like a counselor, to help me process my emotions regarding having to move around a lot. But overall, I gained so much from the experiences growing up."
Gina's Advice for Current Third Culture Kids
- Reach out and talk to someone about how you're feeling — someone who can acknowledge your circumstances and understand that what you're going through is different.
- Don't dismiss your feelings. Know that what you're feeling is normal, like not fitting in or feeling like you don't belong anywhere.
- Don't be afraid to make friends. Be open to new experiences and new people. You can still make friends for life, even if you're only in one place for a year or two.
- Be curious. Soak it up — the culture and people. You may not have this chance again. Write about it, cry about it, sing about it, talk about it. Express yourself!
Gina's Advice for Parents of Third Culture Kids
- Find an expat community who can give support and advice.
- Collaborate with teachers and counselors to be your child's advocate.
- Be self-aware of your own feelings and get outside support if you need help processing them. Don't process your feelings with your kids as it may not be age appropriate.
- Listen to your children. Ask them how their day was and if there are any issues at school academically or socially.
- Find a counselor even if there are no issues so that they have a connection for support. Don't wait until they need it.
Knowing how to navigate the ups and the downs is important not only for Third Culture Kids but also for their parents. The world of Third Culture Kids is an exciting one that can provide many unique opportunities and perspectives. In the end, Third Culture Kids become global citizens — a gift of a lifetime.